What's in a word

What’s in a word? 

I’ve always thought myself a writer, full of inspiration, motivation and things to say but after the initial idea behind this blog, I’ve found myself struggling with adequate topics. I didn’t want this blog to simply be a recount of daily activities or a myriad of thoughts and emotions. I wanted it to be something more, something I could be proud of, something I could sign my name to and possibly something to show future employers. That spark of originality has since left me struggling to fill the empty void.

With so much free time on my hands, I’ve realized how valuable friends are. I have always had a handful of trustworthy friends but I’ve never considered myself the social butterfly. However, last Saturday I turned over a new (and hopefully long-lasting) leaf. I kicked the social nerves to the curb.

I ventured to the Moscow, ID Farmer’s Market with a couple friends, where I tried some delicious garbanzo beans and rice. Later I met different friends at a WSU baseball game on a lovely Saturday afternoon before enjoying some friendly sand volleyball with the summer residence life staff. Later we gathered to watch movies. I had a blast just being social and laughing, not caring what others might think of me, something I think has held me back in the past. I wonder how this re-discovered sociality would transfer to life after college, where multitudes of friends do not surround me.

Friends back home have spread out across the region. Some continue on to graduate school while others search for jobs, wherever they can find them. I have a few friends at church that I hope and plan to reconnect with but this also brings about some nervousness. I’ve known these people for a few years but we mostly just developed summer friendships as every Fall I returned to WSU, 5hrs on the other side of the state. Within the young adults group, friendships have grown tighter and relationships have developed in my absence. I feel I missed out on some of those friendship cultivations by leaving every Fall and returning late Spring. Three months is a short time to create deep friendship bonds.

This last time I drive away from Pullman is sure to bring a mixed bag of emotions: joy for now being a college graduate, excitement to start a new adventure, fear of the known. I have faith that everything will work out and I will be where I am supposed to be, no doubt with a little nervousness, confusion and excitement.

The woman in the mirror saw a shy, naïve girl but today, I see a young woman, full of passion and faith, confident in herself.